Courage Without Fear

Happy Independence Day!

It's the 4th of July, which means parades, picnics and fireworks.  However, this morning I woke up (early with the kids as usual) and as I sat with my two boys I wondered how I could convey to a 4 yr old why we have a parade today.  He's a very smart boy and picks up on a lot of things, but Independence Day is still a hard one to describe to him.  So as I tried searching on the internet for stories, etc for young children on the topic, I realized that probably not too many adults actually take the time to understand this day either...for most, it is just a day off of work.  So today, I invite you to take a look at the Declaration of Independence:  http://www.ushistory.org/Declaration/document/index.htm 

Now, I freely admit to my students (I'm a math teacher) that I HATED history in high school...and my husband, the history buff, knows I'm not big on it...but maybe that's because it never was "real" to me.  Now as an adult in the situation where everyone on the street thinks they can tell me their view on the war (which by the way, I don't want to hear...I have a hard enough time keeping my house running while my husband is gone) I think back to those days when our country was being established.  Now I can read the words of the Declaration of Independence and understand the feelings behind the words...these were real people, living real lives and they needed freedom.

So while you're out sporting your red, white and blue at a parade or barbeque, just take a minute to really appreciate your independence...despite what you think of the current war...you can always move to another country if you don't like this one :)

Nighttime Rambling

We're soon hitting the 6 month mark for having Micah deployed...if you count the time he was gone working in Michigan, its been almost 9 months without him here.  Through that time, I've had many ups and downs but no time to write about them...being a full time high school teacher and trying to take care of 2 boys, 2 dogs, 2 cats and 2 gerbils (until they recently died) left me no time for anything other than laundry and dishes just to survive.  I am now off for the summer and have a bit of time to write once in awhile.  Last night both the boys fell asleep relatively early and I had a chance to start writing thoughts.  I sent it to Micah and he thought I should post it....rambling, but still my thoughts for good or bad.  I'm sure more will come....

How can you describe what it is really like to have your husband deployed?  All I can say is that at times it is more difficult than a divorce or death, as I can imagine it to be.  I haven’t experienced death of a husband, or a divorce for that matter, but the difference I see with deployment is that in both of those cases, time heals the wounds.  With death or divorce, I see the chance to say something has ended and it is time to move on.  With deployment, there is no “end”…just a constant lingering in a state of waiting.  There is no moving on, as you know your husband will be returning.  You can’t just say its time to begin a life of your own without him, because you are still married…married yet not together sharing in each other’s lives.

My friend has remarked a few times about articles she has read regarding divorce rates among those deployed.  She seems surprised by the articles, but it isn’t so surprising to someone living through a deployment.  How do you really build a relationship through the little phone calls and emails?  Phone calls are killers too…you really want to talk to the person, to hear their voice just one more time…but then the letdown comes when you realize you don’t have much to say.  They can’t really talk about the mission (and I want it that way if it means he’s safe), and I can’t describe fully in words what is happening here.  I try my best to keep him up to date on what the kids are doing, how they are growing, etc. but it doesn’t mean much over the phone.  And how do I balance telling him all the cool things the boys can do without making him too sad because he can’t be here to witness it himself?  Ah…but back to the divorce rate…

As I see it, any marriage has ups and downs.  Every marriage takes work.  People change and grow but usually you are together to experience the life altering circumstances.  With deployment, both people are enduring physical and mental limits …but they are different physical and mental limits.  For the person overseas, it is dealing with the mission at hand, the things they see going on over there and mentally dealing with the fact that life at home goes on without them.  For the person back home, its being left with the responsibility of taking care of the house and kids on their own and mentally trying not to think about what “could” happen to the deployed person.  Again, a difference I see here between deployment and death or divorce is that if my husband died or we got a divorce, I would probably pick up my kids and move closer to family in order to receive help in getting through the situation.  With a deployment, I can’t just pick up and move…we have jobs and a house right here that will still be used when my husband returns. I must endure this as best I can until the time comes for him to come home. Don’t get me wrong, I have wonderful family and friends who help as much as possible.  Unfortunately, going through a deployment alters your life in such a way that you don’t even know what help to ask for….

Ok, so I’m rambling on with various thoughts…there is so much to address…the boys dealing (or not dealing well) with daddy being gone,  how to keep myself from going crazy, the various things that go wrong when your husband is deployed, and how you can pick up your relationship when he does return.  So many thoughts in my head and just not the words to explain them all…maybe I can write a few lines a day and somehow find a way to make it all make sense…

But for now, I head to bed early.  Both boys are asleep and I’m exhausted, mentally and physically, but mostly mentally.

Vice President Cheney visits 1-126 Cav

On Monday, September 25, 2006, my guard unit had the distinct honor of hosting a visit by Vice President Dick Cheney at the Grand Valley Armory in Wyoming Michigan.

The armory was draped in memorabilia from the 126 Regimental Association/Grand Rapids Guard historical archives and Soldiers, Marines, Vets and their families filled the auditorium waiting in anticipation. Secret Service Agents in plain clothes walked the stage and gym floor while their uniformed counterparts searched bags and ran metal detecting wands around visitors arms and legs.

Even though it took nearly 40 minutes to get in the door, no one seemed to mind the lack of air conditioning in the gym that afternoon. I guess the chance to hear the VP speak in person negated the inconveniences. I even know for sure that there were some Democrats in the audience. :)

I personally have never seen someone of that importance in the world up close. I was very impressed with VP Cheney's speech. The text of which can be found here.  He thanked the soldiers of the 126th Cav for their service in every mobilization since 9/11/01. From hurricanes, to combat, to border security, the 126th has been represented, and he thanked us for that. That was pretty cool.

He also singled out one of my soldiers, Sergeant First Class Ted Mills. SFC Mills served as my Motor Sergeant while two of his sons also served in my company. His third son was in Fallujah during the same period that we were in Baghdad. While VP Cheney told the crowd about the Mills family, SFC Mills and his boys were standing behind him with about 100 other soldiers on the stage. I could see Ted's smile and the appreciation on his face from across the room. I was very proud to have SFC Ted Mills and his sons serve with me.

VP Cheney also spoke of Sergeant First Class Noel Plaska who served in Afghanistan training the Afghan National Armory, while his son Specialist Michael Plaska served with me in Baghdad. In fact, SFC Plaska's picture can be found here in my blog. I remember SPC Plaska's mother emailing me and saying thanks for posting that picture of her son.

Monday was a once in a lifetime event. I'm very glad that my wife beth, son Evan and parents Mike and Leslie Bell were able to join me for the visit. I only hope that the next time the VP visits, it is to thank us for just being there, because hopefully the war will be over.

Link to articles on Vice President Cheney's visit to the Grand Valley Armory.

Free ebook for deployed troops

So most of you may know that one of my blog posts was published as part of the book "Blog of War by Matt Burden".

If not, here's the short story; one of my postings was picked by Matt Burden of the blog Black Five to be published in a book by Simon and Schuster. The book is entirely made up of blog postings from Soldiers/Sailors/Airmen and Marines or thir families.

Titled "The Blog of War", the book tells about all facets of the war from the people fighting it, not just journalists.

Simon and Schuster has provided contributors to the book with the ability to give eBook (PDF) copies of the book to troops deployed down range as part of the marketing campaign. We're supposed to only provide it to enlisted troops.

Anyway, if you're deployed, and want a copy of the book, please email me from your .mil email account. Email me at emt.micah AT gmail.com.

This offer lasts til Oct 31st. Please only requests from deployed troops.

For the rest of you, the book can be found here: Amazon.com

Thanks for your support, Micah

The Book is OUT!

Okay, so I haven't really posted anything new to the blog since oh...June. Sorry about that. But that doesn't mean things haven't been going on.

The most recent new thing to happen is THE BOOK IS OUT! What book you say, well the book that incorporates this blog into it. BlackFive.net has the big story.

Basically, one of the most well respected bloggers in the military blogging world put together a book of blog entries and got it published by Simon and Schuster. I may have mentioned this once before, here. Matt Burden asked if he could use my post "Just Call me Mr Mayor" in the book and of course I said yes. And now, almost a year later, the book has been published.

It's available here from Amazon.com and should also be available at most Barnes and Noble stores. A list of other blogs that appear in the ook is at the end of this post.

In other news, Beth and I are expecting another child in February. We're hoping for a little sister for Evan. He's excited too! He says good night to the baby every night and kisses Beth's belly. Hopefully he'll still be that loving once the baby comes out and is crying at all hours of the day.

Beth is back at school while Evan is attending day care again. She has a new principle this year and so far things are going well. He's a former marine and military school headmaster, so I'm sure he and I will get along.

On the military front, I'm back to attending drill once a month, for now anyway. I'm giving very serious consideration to transferring to the Ready Reserves. I've lost so much time from my family and career by deploying, that even a weekend a month is a lot right now. We'll see what happens with that soon enough, and I'll keep you all informed.

List of blogs that were included in the book "The Blog of War":

365 and a Wakeup
A Day in Iraq
American at Heart
American Soldier
Argghhh!
Armor Geddon
Army Wife Toddler Mom
AustinBay.net
Biting Their Little Heads Off
Blog Machine City
Boots in Baghdad
Cali Valley Girl
Counter Column
Courage Without Fear
CPT Patti...the Sweetest Woman on the Planet Goes to Baghdad
Dadmanly
Doc in the Box
Fire Power Forward
From My Position...On the Way!
Going Green Again
Howdy (Camel Spider)
In Iraq for 365
Learning to Live
Ma Deuce Gunner
Magic from the Baghdad Cafe
Makaha Surf Report
Medicine Soldier
Military Bride
Mudville Gazette
New Lives
One Hand Clapping
Pull on Superman's Cape
The Questing Cat
Rebel Coyote
Red State Rants
SGT Hook
Sic Vis Pace, Para Bellum
Six More Months
Some Soldier's Mom
Smash
The Sniper Eye
A Soldier's Perspective
Talking Salmons
This Is Your War
Training for Eternity
Trying to Grok
Wordsmith at War
And Powerline's combat correspondent "Major E"

So I've been home for like 2 months and haven't posted....

That's not a big deal is it? Well, maybe it is.

After a well deserved month home sitting on my butt and another month back at work, I've finally decided to update my blog. To those of you who were following my regular 'Rants From Downrange', I apologize for taking so long to update you.

Like my wife's last post eluded to, myself and my men arrived back in Grand Rapids, Michigan on March 26. Photos of the celebration can be seen here, in the Iraq Homecoming photo album. It was a wonderful celebration which overwhelmed most of us. There were hundreds of well wishers and family members there to welcome us home. Dry eyes were the exception and not the norm.

I have updated the site a little bit as you can see. The design has changed and I have added a bunch more photos. All the photo albums are now listed on the left hand side of the page.

I added photos from the company's redeployment home, our welcome home ceremony, my family's vacation to Tennessee and the joint party my wife threw for Evan's birthday and me coming home. I've also posted some personal pics of some recent training I did at work.

Over the last 16 months this blog has been primarily about my soldiers deployed to Iraq. While I am still in the National Guard, I will probably post more about my family, my son Evan and my work. This blog will maintain it's military theme, but I will post about the other parts of my life as I continue to transform back into a citizen soldier.

Thank you all for your encouragement, your kinds words and your prayers. Please continue to think of the Soldiers, Sailors, Airmen, Marines and Coastguardsmen deployed around the world.

Coming Home Tomorrow!

Last update for now...Micah is scheduled to arrive in Michigan tomorrow morning!!!  Evan and I are going up tonight, meeting Micah's parents and then heading to the homecoming ceremony in the morning.  I can't tell you how must weight was lifted off my shoulders just knowing he was in the US, and now so much more will be lifted when I see him in person and we can hold him again!  Can't write much more as I have so much to get done AND a 2 yr old wanting me to read to him...thanks to all of you who have read this along the way and kept us in your prayers/thoughts.

Beth

Back on American Soil!

Just wanted to update you all in case Micah can't get to a computer right now...he's in the US now!  I was called out of a conference at work to hear that my husband was on the phone.  I got on the line, and sure enough, Micah let me know he's actually in New Jersey now!  That means he's going to be home, home very soon.  Evan and I are excited to go pick him up and bring him back to our house...wow, that sounds weird!

Beth

On the Way Home!

Micah sent me an e-mail to let me know where he is in the journey home and asked me to update everyone.  It says he arrived in Kuwait yesterday after spending a few days at the Baghdad airport.  He says he'll be leaving Kuwait soon, but of course, can't tell me when....I guess he's lucky he sent the e-mail since our bank account was showing a charge in Dallas, TX and I was getting mad that he didn't let his wife know he was in the US...then today the account posted completely and said "Baghdad Airport AAFES...Dallas, TX"...must be a PX based out of Dallas that is at the airport?  I guess I can't kick him out of the house when he first gets back now :)  I'll keep you posted along the way of where he is if he can't get online to do it.

Beth

My Turn

Ok, so I was going to sit back and watch all the comments flow freely after Micah made his last entry...but it seems some people feel the need to attack my husband personally...which I won't stand for.  You can say what you want about the war, the President and whether or not you believe my husband should be over there, but don't think you can attack his character.  No, my husband isn't a wife beater...unless he has another wife that I don't know about.   I love the generalization that he's in the military so he must be a wife beater....wow, that makes sense...what an ignorant comment.  Ignorant in the true sense of the word...only someone so ignorant about the military and the men in it would make a comment like that.

Anyway, as I wrote to Micah after reading his first entry on the topic a few days ago, I often find myself having to listen to comments such as these back here on the homefront.  My most common source of comments comes from my students.  I'm a high school teacher and it amazes me how ignorant some of my students are about this country and the world in general.  Our state now requires us to say the Pledge of Allegiance and take a moment of silence every morning.  I have students who refuse to stand up, let alone say the Pledge...and that's their right.  One of them asked me if I would continue to stand and say it everyday if no one else stood with me...hmm...let me think about that...uh, yes.  I told them that because of men like my husband who served in the military throughout all these years, they now have the right to believe the way they do.    Every day I use that moment of silence to pray that somewhere along the way, someone smacks them across the head and wakes them up to the reality of what a great country they live in...and so now, I will add the rest of you to that prayer....may someone smack you across the head :)